For us moms, it may seem like self-care is a luxury we simply cannot afford. With the demands of parenting, work, and household responsibilities, it can be easy to neglect our own needs. The idea of taking a pause didn’t cross my mind until a few years ago when I was on the verge of a mental breakdown. I desperately needed a stop and reset. Luckily for me, one day my husband took the kids and the baby to see some of his relatives and I decided to stay home (you know sometimes in-laws can be a bit much).
That day at home by myself was exactly what the doctor ordered. For the first time in a long time, I could clear my mind of EVERYTHING! and since that day, I made it a point of duty to take two hours every week for self-care. Since then, I find that taking care of myself works wonders for my overall well-being and my life is a little less chaotic. I am so much happier, which is why I have penned my ten self-care habits that have changed my life as a mom.
What is Self-Care
Self-care has been defined as a conscious act people take in order to promote their own physical, mental, and emotional health. It is not just about finding ways to relax, or taking fancy baths and doing yoga, but it is really about taking care of yourself mentally, physically, emotionally, socially, and spiritually.
Prioritizing Sleep
According to the sleep foundation.org , Sufficient sleep, especially REM sleep, facilitates the brain’s processing of emotional information. They believe that during sleep, the brain works to evaluate and remember thoughts and memories, and it appears that a lack of sleep is especially harmful to the consolidation of positive emotional content. I could tell when my body didn’t get enough rest because I would feel overwhelmed and irritated pretty easily. I know that as a mom, sleep can often be hard to come by, so I had to make a conscious decision to get as close to 8 hours of sleep every day and not just naps but deep sleep or what the experts call REM sleep.
My iPhone has my bedtime set at 10 pm, my kids are in bed every night by 7:30 pm and I use the next 2 hours to check off my mental list to make sure they are set for school the next day. I then crack my bedroom window open to allow some fresh air to circulate in my room. Then I take a warm shower, most times I use a body scrub because it leaves my skin feeling extra soft, if I am up to it, I take a warm bath and add some bath bombs.
When I get out of the shower I would read something lighthearted, definitely not the news, nothing political or too heavy that would affect my mood, but something fictional and light. I started reading comics it would give me a chuckle or a listen to a lighthearted funny podcast.
Exercise Regularly
I have three small children so a gym membership may never get used. But do carve out 20 mins every day to do some steps on my little exercise stepping machine . I find that exercise is a great way to relieve stress and boost my mood. On Sundays I may go for a little walk around the neighborhood to get some fresh air.
Make Time for Hobbies
Pursuing hobbies and interests that bring us joy is an important aspect of self-care. I try to set aside time each week to engage in activities that I enjoy. Aside from writing, I really enjoy adult coloring books, it’s a great way for me to relax and concentrate.
Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness is a type of meditation where you focus on being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling in the moment according to Mayo Clinc, without interpretation or judgment. Mindfulness is a powerful tool for reducing stress and increasing feelings of well-being. I incorporate mindfulness into my daily routine through meditation, deep breathing, or simply taking a few moments to focus on my surroundings.
Connect with Friends
Social support is crucial for our mental health and well-being. I make an effort to stay in touch with friends and family members, whether it’s through phone calls, or text messages. I am still very good friends with my college friends and we video keep in touch and have brunches and get together at least once every two months. Most of us are moms so we can’t do any better. As for my extended family, we get together for major holidays and we face time and talk through group text etc.
Take Breaks and Siestas
It’s easy to get caught up in the demands of daily life, but taking breaks is essential for our overall well-being. I try to take short breaks throughout the day to recharge, whether it’s by going for a walk, reading a book, or simply closing my eyes and taking a few deep breaths. Don’t even mention siestas, there’s nothing like a 30 minute nap.
Nourish the Body
Eating a healthy, balanced diet is essential for our physical and emotional health. I make an effort to prioritize nutrient-rich foods, such as fruits, vegetables, and lean proteins, and limit processed foods and sugary snacks. My snacks are mainly nuts and rolled oats and plenty of water. Set a reminder if you have to drink a glass of water every two hours. Your skin and intestines will love you for it.
Set Boundaries
As moms, we often feel like we need to be available 24/7, but setting boundaries is important for our mental health and well-being. I try to communicate my needs clearly and respectfully and set limits on my availability when necessary. I am proud to say as a natural people pleaser I have mastered the art of saying no and quickly changing the subject so I don’t have to explain my ‘no’.
Believing in God
A big part of self-care is spirituality. I am not here to shove religion down anyone’s throat, but believing that there is a greater power who has created me and knows everything about me, yet loves me unconditionally has always given me the drive and purpose even before I start having children. My belief has also been the source of strength during the toughest times in my life.
Gratitude
Gratitude is a powerful practice for increasing feelings of happiness and well-being. I always tell my husband that as bad as the world seems now, there has never been a better time to be alive. As people we have been freer than ever before, we can elect who represents us, we can dress the way we want, we have made the most progress in science and medicine and we can connect with people from all different walks of life. I make an effort to focus on the things in my life that I am grateful for, whether it’s my family, my health, or simply a beautiful sunset.
Ever since I started practicing these simple self-care habits I have found that im much happier, less stressed and I feel so fulfilled and I sincerely hope it does the same for you.
Xoxo monica
